Tweets I Would Have Twittered

Still haven’t mastered the Twitter thing.  What the hell IS a hashtag, anyway?  Too bad, there are a few celebrities and people of note I would like to follow.  I feel like I’m missing out.

But if I DID Twitter, here are some things I would tweet, but don’t because I’m a twit…

  • Men love watches like women love shoes.  I understand the love, but must I be surrounded by watch geeks everywhere I am?
  • Why didn’t the Ramones finish saying the word “basement” in their song “I Don’t Want To Go Down To The Basement?”  Was it a punk thing?
  • While sitting in a cube farm, is it necessary to make all your phone calls on speaker?
  • It’s raining and the bus is crowded.  If you don’t want my umbrella to drip on you, get your ass up and let me sit down.
  • This morning I saw a young guy with a full unruly beard. My first thought was “messy hippy” until in the middle of his conversation he started stroking it.He was elegant.
  • Proud Mommy Moment: Zombiegirl was inducted in the National Junior Honor Society last week.  As did 60% of her soccer team.
  • Thank you, Tim and Chicks for a great weekend at Belleayre Mountain. Saturday night’s 3D adventure (dining, drinking and darts) was a much needed night out.
  • Because of the Etiennes, Zombiegirl now has two new passions- sushi and snowboarding.  Thanks guys.
  • In three weeks, I’ve painted three rooms and laid down three wall-to-wall carpets.   Now the girls can walk on cushion-y softness…
  • The takeover of the MTA Nassau County buses by a private firm have improved the service only marginally.  Let’s hope it gets better.
  • Good luck, @Cheesesticks, in your classes this semester!
  • PEOPLE!  Stop sending out emails with misinformation!  At least check SNOPES.COM to verify if what you’re forwarding is correct or not.  I’m going to start calling you out.
  • Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things…the wise words of a wise man, Steven Tyler.
  • My February filled up way too fast! I have two Heartz and Craftz parties booked, a jewelry party with Eileen (Sparkle-tini 2012!), a soccer tournament, Zombiegirl’s Youth Retreat, three cookie decorating parties, Z-girl’s winter dance, winter recess, Valentine’s Day and…and…I’m probably forgetting something…
  • Although I don’t agree, I like what Ron Paul said about a proposed lunar colony; “I don’t think we should go to the moon, I think we maybe should send some politicians up there.”
  • <Name omitted> If I were married to you, I’d cheat too.
  • Facebook is dead, the novelty has worn off.  Only a few of my die hard friends post anymore.  It’s been commercialized and taken over by corporations and isn’t fun anymore.  Well, except for Words With Friends…
  • I think my cat is having seizures.

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