Voices in my Head

ME: So why’d you leave us hanging?  We’re WAITING to hear about coyotes and ovens and birthdays.

MYSELF: I know, (hanging head) I know.  I’ve just been so…busy.

ME: Well, we think you need to prioritize.  There are people waiting to hear from you and you have to blog about the shit you’ve been doing because it’s been AWESOME- don’t you want to remember it?

MYSELF: I will.  Just let me watch this last episode of EXTREME COUPONING…

ME: What?  You’re watching TV?  No…no…no.  You have to write.  You have to document.  You have to mail out packages and answer emails.  YOU HAVE TO GET YOUR POST READY FOR THE NEXT SEW MAMA SEW GIVEAWAY!

MYSELF: I’m doing important…research.  I’ve taken the couponing bull by the horns and I need pointers!  These couponing women are insane and I want to be just like them.  The other day at work, my mail guy comes over to my desk to ask me to sign something and he sees my desk covered with cut coupons.  I feebly tried to cover them but I was caught red-handed.  I DID tell him I was running a routine (really, I was!) but I don’t think he believed me.  So yeah, instead of blogging, I’ve been going trying to save the family money.

ME: Noble, yes, but back to reality here.  You need to put your thoughts down.  You need to draft a post for the giveaway.  By the way, what are we giving away?

MYSELF: (blank stare)

ME: WHAT?  Don’t you know what you’re giving away yet?

MYSELF: I have an idea.  I just have to finish it.

ME: (groaning) Oh, you never finish anything!  You still have piles of stuff to finish on practically every surface in your sewing room.  We’re doomed.

MYSELF:  I’ll get to it this weekend, I promise.  And I’ll take pretty pictures with my new EGO Light Unit MR got me for my birthday and I’ll write up a post and be all ready for Monday.

ME: We’re not holding our breath.

MYSELF: Really, I will.  AND I’ll finish the draft post about the coyotes and post those pictures.  AND I’ll answer those emails AND ship that package out to California.  Promise.

ME: (Dubiously) Okay.  We’re going to put all our trust in you that you’ll get this done this weekend.

I: Speak for yourself, schizo.  She’s still got two episodes left of EXTREME COUPONING on the DVR.

ME: Where’s that remote?

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