Countdown to Christmas – Calamaties Part Deux

I’m feeling 98% better now.  Seems I had a sinus/lung infection.  Thanks to Kansas and her Pizza Posse, the whole house caught the cold she brought home.  For some weird reason it lingered and festered in my body.  Enough that I had to drag my ass to the doctor for a round of antibiotics.  Beena’s on AB’s too.  That’s a good thing because she started student teaching today.

The week before Thanksgiving, I had a few of Z-girl’s friends over to help decorate turkey sugar cookies.  I brought out my box of cookie cutters and Dad gave me the rest of Mom’s, so my collection doubled.  I used her big turkey cutter and the girls and I baked then decorated.  Zombiegirl went for the shock cookie- a zombie bunny, complete with blood dripping from it’s fangs.

She’s such a weirdo.

I got the recipe from Recipe Girl’s No Fail Sugar Cookies.  I think I should always cook/bake something with the title of “No Fail” from now on.  These cookies were really good and really easy.  I got the royal icing recipe from the The Hungry Housewife– the same lady I borrowed the Oreo turkey idea from last year.  I was pleasantly surprised by the way the turkey cookies came out:

This was my first attempt at decorating sugar cookies (the semi-professional way.  Decorating cookies with Mom as a kid shouldn’t count.)

They got rave reviews at Thanksgiving at the in-laws.  No one wanted to eat them.

What’s with my desserts and no one eating them?

Don’t answer that.

I was psyched to make Christmas cookies the same way.  I have all these great cutters and the perfect icing…I couldn’t wait.

December ticked slowly by and the cutters stayed on the counter mocking me.  I wanted to wait until everyone was free before we baked, but if I waited that long it would be President’s Day.  I mixed up a batch and tossed it into the refrigerator to chill.  It was DAYS before we finally sat and started on the cookies.

On Christmas Eve Day.  Yup.  We finally found the time to bake the day before Christmas.  Have I mentioned Procrastination is my middle name?

 We rolled and cut and threw them into the oven.  A whole nativity was cut out as was every Christmas tree we had a cutter for.  Finally, they were baked.

Go ahead, ask when we decorated them.  After the presents were opened, ping-pong games were played and before the “guests” arrived, I tossed together the icing ingredients into the mixer and sat the younger girls down to decorate. 

When I pulled the icing out, for some weird reason, it was a little too thick.  I chalked it up to me pulling the wrong recipe up in Gmail.  What I didn’t realize as I ran from my office to the kitchen (because I was too lazy to print it out) was that I shorted the recipe about 1/4 cup of water.

Did I mention I suck?

I gave the girls all the colors they asked for and like the troopers they were they spread the stucco-like icing on the cookies.  I was too stressed (sick) to care.

After dinner, Beena took a good look at our cookies.  I think she used the words “vomit” and “sick” while talking about them.

 What is this, an Oompa Loompa?

         This snowman looks like he was hacked with a machete to his neck.           

This tree has star pus.

This holly looks stucco’ed.

This is the only pretty cookie…


Everyone’s a critic.

They tasted really good, though.  The lack of water in the icing brought out the sugar taste REALLY well.

New Year’s Resolution #1- Read all directions carefully.

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